hmm my life.... i have an autistic child we live on one income in a rural town no jobs available i stay at home to care for her nobody aroud here is qualified for special needs kids outside of school its been me an hubby and her for long time. niot much family around. they have moved out spread out too far to visit consistantly. call them they dont call me. this includes a older brother twin is in fl we call each other all time. mom died in my car while driving alone almost 11 years ago. friends hard to come by have a few. my town was flooded out last july in 07. my area still not recovered from it.i worry a lot about our finaces. my daughter is a star student with highest grades in her class even though she s autistic she goes to regular school. but i still worry for her her future ours. my step dad and his wife are around but it wasnt till recently in last few years they have wanted to be around. my husband is a recovering alcoholic. now about me. i turn 42 in november. im stay at home mom . i take care of house and paying bills on time. i have a few hobbies i like sewing knitting books movies. i know i worry too much. id like to stop doing so much of that but how? i want to be happy and care free.how do i do that too? my husbands family is estranged from him as well over the care and the passing of his mother 4 years ago. the kids dont agree and cant talk to each other because of certain things said and done about his mom.i started having panic and anxiety attacks in april right me and my health care provider decided to put me on lower dose estrogen bith control pills. my periods skipped before but not like this. have spoken to health care provider about this she said keep taking pills till next exam due. my only true resentment for last few years has always been the amount of time i have spent doing things for my family and when i ask hubby to take care something he argues with me over it. i have donre it all for last 10 years . i know he works and is tired but i get mad when he argues over it.i love him what do i do? i started standing up for myself about the way i feel for last couple of years about certain things.but this thing with no periods and feeling sad and depressed and not sleeping and the hot flashes is really gettin me down. it makes me not want to do things go places i actually enjoy . driving as always bugged me but not so much til my mom died. im terrified of being alone in car outside of town or in town. panic attacks and axiety in car do not help or when i have them in public places i dont like them at home.i ordered some self help books on the subject of happiness and achieving it and on depression. hope they help. i know some of reasons i have them but how do i go about control? so many negative things about anti depresion drugs. i know adult life and stress causing most of this. in my 20's i didnt care about more than did i still have a job and paying rent and how was i getting back/forth to work. i guess i am not balanced with all this somehow. was diagnosed with type 2 diabeties 3 years ago lost weight and keeping it of through diet and exercise.

I am now age 50 and finally had a hysterectomy. I too suffered from hot sweats, insomnia and depression. What is going on in your life? I was a workaholic, mother of two young girls and my husband was going thru retraining following an injury at work. I worked overtime, took my girls to all their lessons, and never gave myself any time to just be....How about you? When you stop all the chaos and focus , you will be better able to see why you are struggling.