Dating is Kids' Stuff

Throw away or delete every book, article and clipping you’ve acquired on dating advice (except for the ones you read here, of course). You won’t need them anymore as soon as you read Alec Greven’s masterpiece, How to Talk to Girls. Take this stunningly astute piece of advice from his book, for example:

“Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil…The best choice for most boys is a regular girl. Remember, some pretty girls are coldhearted when it comes to boys. Don't let them get to you.”

Simply a-mazing.

From where does his Zen-like wisdom come, you ask? Nine long years of observation on many a playground. Greven noticed that several of his schoolmates were having problems finding romance, perhaps concerned because of a possible cootie outbreak. So the little love guru wrote his magnificent manual in response to their plight. Take another shinning nugget of truth from the mind of Greven:

“If I say ‘hi’ and you say ‘hi’ back, we’re probably off to a good start.”

Brilliance at its best.

—Laura Lee Bloor