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Wendy Atterberry

Wendy Atterberry

Contributing writer for The Frisky

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Helen Fisher

Anthropologist, author and advisor to Chemistry.com

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Amber Dotts

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The latest news on this change — carefully culled from the world wide web by our change agents. They do the surfing, so you don't have to!

Desperado...

Desperado...

Askmen.com recently ran an advice column about how to avoid "undatable" desperate women. Their relationship correspondent Andrew Moore cited Jennifer Aniston's recent breakup with John Mayer as an example of how when a woman sets herself up on a timeline for marriage and motherhood, it's ultimately a detriment to a relationship. According to the column, telltale signs of a desperate woman are referring to her pets as children, obsessively planning all of your future dates and never expressing an opinion of her own.

Moore doesn't touch on the subject of desperate men, but they're out there too and tend to possess many of the same characteristics of their female counterparts; they immediately say "I love you," agree to all of their partners' opinions and dating ideas, and have a long overlapping string of ex-girlfriends.

So what do you do if you are one of the desperate daters in question? You may not realize that you're putting out a frantic vibe, but chances are if you've set up any kind of timeline for yourself, your partner is going to feel it. It may seem like a radical change, but try rearranging the priorities in your life. There's nothing more attractive than someone who's striving to perfect his or her career, art or community. If your focus is on your professional life, you'll have less time to obsess about your relationship and chances are you'll find romance when you're not even looking.

Posted: 8/29/08