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Not-so Empty Nest
The house is quiet. But it doesn’t alarm you anymore. It’s peaceful and the only sound is the hum of the washing machine…that only needs to do one load! But how would you feel if things were to go back to the way they used to be? What you would you do if your empty nest became filled?
Yes, we mean the children that left for school, or maybe fought and threw tantrums as a child, declaring they couldn’t wait till that day of freedom. But surprise, surprise, look who’s knocking to come back home! According to a study conducted at Princeton University, the number of 20-something-year-olds returning is on the rise. And it seems like now there aren’t many complaints—from parents or the children.
Whether you are providing some steady ground until they find a job, or just wanted to spend more quality time that you missed out on during those adolescent years, the reasons aren’t what matters. Today, living at home with the ‘rents hurdles stereotypes and isn’t anything to be embarrassed about.
The decision is up to each parent to choose to open up and put out the “Welcome” doormat. While helping out a far-from-wealthy young adult, remember that this doesn’t need to be a free ride. Your choice of rent and responsibilities around the house are fair game. What would you consider a fair exchange for reopening your nest? [Wall Street Journal]
My husband had congestive heart failure at the beginning of a school year. My daughter had moved in while going through a divorce and was in the process of moving out; she put that on hold in order to help take care of him so that I could still teach and he wouldn't have to go to a nursing home. Five years later, she still lives at home and I wouldn't EVER have it any other way! Occasionally, she takes a job for a short time; when she has a job, she helps out with the bills--but only because SHE insists. When she has a job, I hire someone to help with my husband while she and I are both out of the house because he cannot be left alone.
On the other hand, my husband's three boys all insist that he is MY responsibility. They want nothing to do with him and his care. They don't even come to visit him unless they want money. Every time they HAVE come to our home, they have stolen something. They have stolen so much that they aren't welcome unless I am here to supervise their visit. I wouldn't let one of them move in for any reason!